Saturday, April 16, 2011

"Thirst" (a poem)

What is it that I want from him
I question over and over again
I know I’m not the only one
And we agreed “its just for fun”

But this now is more than just play
I fell for him and lost my way
Forgot of what I’m truly made
And watched my inhibitions fade

Not knowing what I truly seek
I got caught up and in too deep
My heart’s desire to be his choice
Although this need I could not voice

I feared that he would turn away
Bound by my flesh, asked him to stay
He learned my needs and met them well
The longing in my chest he’d quell
As long as I could wait my turn
He’s not the first, I’ll never learn

What is it that I want from him
I question over and over again
I thirst for love, hunger for peace
He fills the void, the aching ceased
Then I awake, realize he’s gone
The ache returns, for him I long

I wait in pain for his return
Pray for the peace my heart doth yearn
In comes the echo, “you’re not the only one..
...and you agreed 'its just for fun'”

Then from inside a 
Speaks into me “you have a choice!”

My mind now quieted by the Love I seek
Open my heart as it continues to  speak
"You've done this before, haven't you learned
You are gift that should be earned?'
You must be still and you will know"

and in the silence, I let him go
Replaced by a love like no other
My love of Self, not from another
An endless stream to quench my thirst
Constant reminder of who comes first...

   …Be Still and Know I Am…


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