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Song of the Moment: "As" by Stevie Wonder (lyrics below)
Yesterday I sent out a note to the group. Later in the day, I received a note from a member indicating that he was leaving the group. In his note, he explained: " I am not comfortable when people are so openly expressing deep personal feelings like love and fear and doubt towards relatively strangers. And that we are, we members of your group. In the Netherlands we only say I LOVE YOU to very intimate friends." He attributed this to cultural differences as I am from the US. The writer went on to say that he felt that in the discussions, the quality of the input from other members may be less than insightful "... I see a lot of superficial 'acting out' of being spiritual and feeling persons with some of the group members. Saying you appreciate and even love each other a lot does not make it more real, I fear."
My initial response to the writer, although supportive and affirmative relative to my desire to remain connected, was very defensive. I felt attacked and felt the members who I love so dearly were also being attacked and so I drew a line around myself (and the group) and commented: "... [I] believe...a true connection is... free of any conditions or stipulations around how they should or should not behave to validate my (desire) to feel connected to them. With that said, I respect your choice and affirm my relationship with you (smile)...Membership is optional...love and acceptance (at least until love is possible) is required."
As I reflected on this exchange later, I realized that I was being just as judgmental and segregative as I'd perceived the writer to be. I had missed an opportunity to connect with him, in the way I have always supported and encouraged in others. After all, he didn’t have to write me a note at all. He could have simply left the group. In my introspection, I understood that despite what I perceived the words to mean, that this was a reaching out. This member has not attended the discussions, but I would assume has kept track of them via the webposts. I also could not recall a time when I have conversed with him on a personal level. This might seem insignificant, as there are many members in the group with whom I have not interacted with on a personal level, but the fact that he took the time to compose a well articulated message to me says something...more than I was willing to acknowledge in my initial defensiveness.
Drawing lines, making judgments, separation …are against everything I believe. I will accept his choice, of course… but will release any feelings of discontent around the experience. That is what love IS. I will not stop loving him... I will not stop loving YOU, because IMHO love is ALWAYS the answer... ALWAYS. We are so interdependent upon one another. It was divinely indoctrinated. No wo/man is an island, although socially we may feel that way sometimes. I attribute the growth of the group less to anything I have done (other than provide a means to come together) but more because people feel connected to something. I think members feel affirmed, cared for, validated.. but most importantly, not alone.
Thank you for being a part of the group...
Thank you for being willing to connect with one another...
Thank you for being....and loving!
Peace & blessings with LOVE
Acu
XOXO
"As" by Stevie Wonder
As around the sun the earth knows she's revolving
And the rosebuds know to bloom in early May
Just as hate knows love's the cure
You can rest your mind assure
That I'll be loving you always
As now can't reveal the mystery of tomorrow
But in passing will grow older every day
Just as all is born is new
Do know what I say is true
That I'll be loving you always
Until the rainbow burns the stars out in the sky---ALWAYS
Until the ocean covers every mountain high---ALWAYS
Until the dolphin flies and parrots live at sea---ALWAYS
Until we dream of life and life becomes a dream
Did you know that true love asks for nothing
Her acceptance is the way we pay
Did you know that life has given love a guarantee
To last through forever and another day
Just as time knew to move on since the beginning
And the seasons know exactly when to change
Just as kindness knows no shame
Know through all your joy and pain
That I'll be loving you always
As today I know I'm living but tomorrow
Could make me the past but that I mustn't fear
For I'll know deep in my mind
The love of me I've left behind Cause I'll be loving you always
Until the day is night and night becomes the day---ALWAYS
Until the trees and seas just up and fly away---ALWAYS
Until the day that 8x8x8 is 4---ALWAYS
Until the day that is the day that are no more
Did you know that you're loved by somebody?
Until the day the earth starts turning right to left---ALWAYS
Until the earth just for the sun denies itself
I'll be loving you forever
Until dear Mother Nature says her work is through---ALWAYS
Until the day that you are me and I am you---ALWAYS
Until the rainbow burns the stars out in the sky~~ALWAYS
We all know sometimes lifes hates and troubles
Can make you wish you were born in another time and space
But you can bet you life times that and twice its double
That God knew exactly where he wanted you to be placed
so make sure when you say you're in it but not of it
You're not helping to make this earth a place sometimes called Hell
Change your words into truths and then change that truth into love
And maybe our children's grandchildren
And their great-great grandchildren will tell
I'll be loving you
Until the rainbow burns the stars out in the sky--Loving you
Until the ocean covers every mountain high--Loving you
Until the dolphin flies and parrots live at sea--Loving you
Until we dream of life and life becomes a dream--Be loving you
Until the day is night and night becomes the day--Loving you
Until the trees and seas up, up and fly away--Loving you
Until the day that 8x8x8x8 is 4--Loving you
Until the day that is the day that are no more--Loving you
Until the day the earth starts turning right to left--Be loving you
Until the earth just for the sun denies itself--Loving you
Until dear Mother Nature says her work is through--Loving you
Until the day that you are me and I am you--
Now ain't that loving you
Until the rainbow burns the stars out in the sky
Ain't that loving you
Until the ocean covers every mountain high
And I've got to say always
Yesterday I sent out a note to the group. Later in the day, I received a note from a member indicating that he was leaving the group. In his note, he explained: " I am not comfortable when people are so openly expressing deep personal feelings like love and fear and doubt towards relatively strangers. And that we are, we members of your group. In the Netherlands we only say I LOVE YOU to very intimate friends." He attributed this to cultural differences as I am from the US. The writer went on to say that he felt that in the discussions, the quality of the input from other members may be less than insightful "... I see a lot of superficial 'acting out' of being spiritual and feeling persons with some of the group members. Saying you appreciate and even love each other a lot does not make it more real, I fear."
My initial response to the writer, although supportive and affirmative relative to my desire to remain connected, was very defensive. I felt attacked and felt the members who I love so dearly were also being attacked and so I drew a line around myself (and the group) and commented: "... [I] believe...a true connection is... free of any conditions or stipulations around how they should or should not behave to validate my (desire) to feel connected to them. With that said, I respect your choice and affirm my relationship with you (smile)...Membership is optional...love and acceptance (at least until love is possible) is required."
As I reflected on this exchange later, I realized that I was being just as judgmental and segregative as I'd perceived the writer to be. I had missed an opportunity to connect with him, in the way I have always supported and encouraged in others. After all, he didn’t have to write me a note at all. He could have simply left the group. In my introspection, I understood that despite what I perceived the words to mean, that this was a reaching out. This member has not attended the discussions, but I would assume has kept track of them via the webposts. I also could not recall a time when I have conversed with him on a personal level. This might seem insignificant, as there are many members in the group with whom I have not interacted with on a personal level, but the fact that he took the time to compose a well articulated message to me says something...more than I was willing to acknowledge in my initial defensiveness.
Drawing lines, making judgments, separation …are against everything I believe. I will accept his choice, of course… but will release any feelings of discontent around the experience. That is what love IS. I will not stop loving him... I will not stop loving YOU, because IMHO love is ALWAYS the answer... ALWAYS. We are so interdependent upon one another. It was divinely indoctrinated. No wo/man is an island, although socially we may feel that way sometimes. I attribute the growth of the group less to anything I have done (other than provide a means to come together) but more because people feel connected to something. I think members feel affirmed, cared for, validated.. but most importantly, not alone.
Thank you for being a part of the group...
Thank you for being willing to connect with one another...
Thank you for being....and loving!
Peace & blessings with LOVE
Acu
XOXO
"As" by Stevie Wonder
As around the sun the earth knows she's revolving
And the rosebuds know to bloom in early May
Just as hate knows love's the cure
You can rest your mind assure
That I'll be loving you always
As now can't reveal the mystery of tomorrow
But in passing will grow older every day
Just as all is born is new
Do know what I say is true
That I'll be loving you always
Until the rainbow burns the stars out in the sky---ALWAYS
Until the ocean covers every mountain high---ALWAYS
Until the dolphin flies and parrots live at sea---ALWAYS
Until we dream of life and life becomes a dream
Did you know that true love asks for nothing
Her acceptance is the way we pay
Did you know that life has given love a guarantee
To last through forever and another day
Just as time knew to move on since the beginning
And the seasons know exactly when to change
Just as kindness knows no shame
Know through all your joy and pain
That I'll be loving you always
As today I know I'm living but tomorrow
Could make me the past but that I mustn't fear
For I'll know deep in my mind
The love of me I've left behind Cause I'll be loving you always
Until the day is night and night becomes the day---ALWAYS
Until the trees and seas just up and fly away---ALWAYS
Until the day that 8x8x8 is 4---ALWAYS
Until the day that is the day that are no more
Did you know that you're loved by somebody?
Until the day the earth starts turning right to left---ALWAYS
Until the earth just for the sun denies itself
I'll be loving you forever
Until dear Mother Nature says her work is through---ALWAYS
Until the day that you are me and I am you---ALWAYS
Until the rainbow burns the stars out in the sky~~ALWAYS
We all know sometimes lifes hates and troubles
Can make you wish you were born in another time and space
But you can bet you life times that and twice its double
That God knew exactly where he wanted you to be placed
so make sure when you say you're in it but not of it
You're not helping to make this earth a place sometimes called Hell
Change your words into truths and then change that truth into love
And maybe our children's grandchildren
And their great-great grandchildren will tell
I'll be loving you
Until the rainbow burns the stars out in the sky--Loving you
Until the ocean covers every mountain high--Loving you
Until the dolphin flies and parrots live at sea--Loving you
Until we dream of life and life becomes a dream--Be loving you
Until the day is night and night becomes the day--Loving you
Until the trees and seas up, up and fly away--Loving you
Until the day that 8x8x8x8 is 4--Loving you
Until the day that is the day that are no more--Loving you
Until the day the earth starts turning right to left--Be loving you
Until the earth just for the sun denies itself--Loving you
Until dear Mother Nature says her work is through--Loving you
Until the day that you are me and I am you--
Now ain't that loving you
Until the rainbow burns the stars out in the sky
Ain't that loving you
Until the ocean covers every mountain high
And I've got to say always
