I was talking with one of my four-year-old twins who refused to take off her princess costume for clothes I thought more appropriate for heading out. She told me, "When I grow up, I'm going to be a princess and I'll wear a long Cinderella gown all the time." I encouraged her pointing out (in a way she understood) that there is nothng in this world you "CAN'T" do although there are some things she "can't yet" do due to physical, social and knowledge limitations. She finally agreed to wear the costume over her clothes. :))
It is curious to me how the innocence of childhood can be so profound. When we were young we believed that anything was possible. As we got older, and became laden with the responsibilities of being an adult and society's push to conform to a "norm" we slowly began to lose that feeling of limitlessness. We lose sight of who it is we feel strongly we want to be...to become. So then begins the process of trying to recapture the bliss of our youth. Our parents/caregivers are the first to set the foundation for our ability to realize these paths. Some of us are placed properly on our journey, but most of us begin far off course. We become engaged in many relationships: peers, teachers, authority figures who "help" us to know that we shouldn't be doing this or that. It is better to "BE" something else...and so we conform.
I have this theory that when each of us is born we have encoded in us, who it is we are to become. A doctor, a priest, a thief, a princess :)) and we are given all the emotional tools to be motivated by these paths and to follow them. Why do I believe this happens? It is the relationships we have with one another -directly and indirectly- that facilitates our interdependence. We assist each other in realizing our true selves through our experiences with one another. The thief will steal from me and as a result I gain a feeling of appreciation for what I have. When she is caught, she (ideally perhaps) experiences remorse for her actions and its impact on another. These experiences create *life* and facilitate living, versus some grey existance where everything is constant and never changes. There must be contrasts in our experiences to make meaning of our lives and who we are. (The movies "Crash" and "Butterfly Effect" offer great examples of this)
We all want to be happy... to be loved. I think we sometimes fail to recognize that underlying all our thinking, motives, behavior is that one true drive. We tell ourselves all sorts of "things" will give us that. Money, a big house, a relationship...the reality is that those are a means to an end. Happiness...love...resides within. There is no tangible thing that can give it to us. Relationships (and the things we acquire) help us generate a feeling, but it is often fleeting. To access the sustaining feelings of happiness/love within, however, we must become clear about who it is we truly are.
It is interal drives, strong urges that guide us and it is up to us whether we yield to them and enjoy our journey or resist them to conform to something other than that which drives us. Life is a journey, not a destination...follow your bliss!
In love and light...blessings!
Acu
"Miss Q'N" by Zap Mama
When I was a little child
I dreamed to be a princess
When I tried to be this princess
I dreamed to meet a prince
When I was this princess
I dreamed to be like a queen
When I was this princess
I dreamed to meet a prince
CHORUS
Traveling from the north to the south
Southern stories
South to the east, east to the west
We're all looking for the best
Traveling from the south to the north
Northern Stories
North to the east, east to the west
We're all looking for the best
When I met this prince, I dreamed to be a queen
When I tried to be this queen, I dreamed to meet a king
When I was with this prince, I dreamed to be a queen
When I was this queen, I didn't know what to do with this prince
CHORUS
When I was this queen
Like society tell us to be.
I realize that i was empty.
I was empty inside
When I was this queen
Fooled by corruptive behavior
I realized that I wanna be, I wanna be, I wanna be me