For the past few weeks I have been immersed in the process of building a new understanding of my Self in this world. There have been so many changes and negative events pervading our media and psyche that I felt it necessary to delve deeper into my own Mind to find a peaceful space to rest.
Synchronistically, I was invited to join a Black Consciousness group and was reintroduced to the spiritual material that had served, in part, to facilitate my own awakening. I was not prepared for the emergence of old wounds as I re-engaged this learning and sharing with the community.
I think what I am realizing, through new eyes, is that we are all in different places in our spiritual development and path. When I willingly began this journey, I felt so unsure about my beliefs and understanding. Some of the teachings were confusing and contradicted one another but were all espoused as “truth”. I would shame myself for misunderstanding, but never gave up on finding the TRUTH some of which came from religious and spiritual texts I would have NEVER allowed myself to examine prior to “opening the way” for new information. I wanted better answers than I had received through my secondary and college educations, church and mentors.
15 years and LOTS of reading, researching and reintegrating history was useful in allowing me to finally create a space in my mind and heart for the acceptance of things that I was taught we not for me (or rejection of ideas/teachings that I realized were not). Each answer encouraged another question, and answer, and question and so on. Mis-Education disempowers because we tend to believe only what has been proven (someone has done it before) and in the absence of “truth” we do not allow ourselves to believe we have power to change or create new understand, situations and LIVES. I am never beyond learning, but am beyond arguing facts because I have learned enough to understand where I came from and what I am capable of HERE and NOW in this world which is much more significant to taking ACTION.
As a woman of both African and Native American descent raised in the SouthEast, I was taught that I had little power. The things that felt right for me, intuitively, were described as sinful or blasphemous. The result of choosing to question (without faith) or pursue another path would result in eternal damnation .. Hell Fire, Brimstone. “God forbid” I burn for eternity. I could not fathom the idea and remained in fear.
It has not been an easy journey. It has required a LOT of healing, a LOT of introspection and a LOT of building around the questions I held deep inside. Things just didn’t make sense and I needed to know why.
In the process I learned that
I Am spiritual,
I Am intuitive,
I Am powerful,
I Am magical,
I Am sensual,
I Am the Divine manifested in human form
I Am connected to the Universe in cosmic ways
I Am a GODDESS!
...and the wisdom I have gained in the process can never be taken from me. I work diligently to protect myself from negative energy/ideas/images that reinforce complacency and ignorance. I focus my energy/attention on the things I want to co-create/manifest in this world for myself, my family, my people.
Knowledge of history, “the TRUTH”, of who we have been is the beginning… but WISDOM comes from knowing Who We Are
Knowledge of history, “the TRUTH”, of who we have been is the beginning… but WISDOM comes from knowing Who We Are
I have become a Soul On Fire, the embodiment of LOVE and I am ready to be a light unto the world.
Ase.Selah ღ
Acu
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